Last night was not what we expected it to be. The Saturday night before Halloween and we were on our way to a RIBZY / WHITE TRASH DEBUTANTES show at bar in Crockett, CA.
How does that happen?
It could have been cool you have to admit. What were the other options? Cover band night at Gilman? Sounded interesting, but no. Snake's B-day show at the HazMat? Snake kicks that party up a notch every year, but in the end it's Pyrate Punx, version 2006. That means that along with some cool punx that we really like, you're going to get some rednecks and hippies thrown into the mix. Couldn't we experience similar in Crockett? Plus, you got a bunch of old schoolers and Ginger Coyote, and that is a recipe for something. Did I mention that the NAKED LADY WRESTLERS were also on the bill? No applause!!
The reality.
Showed up a little too early and walked in as the opening band was covering GREEN DAY. Doh! Ordered the cheapest beer on their menu, Coors, which was $3 a bottle and about to turn skunky at any minute. Then there were all the locals dressed like cowboys, periodically performing mock gun fights in the street outside of the bar. Loud (sounded like real rifle shots) local color, not too bad. Not good either. No punks really, except one girl who seemed punky, and since half her ass was hanging out of her plaid skirt, I'll give her the benefit of the doubt. That is ballsy in any bar, but surrounded by cowboys and drunken ex-sugar mill workers? Pretty punk in my book, until I spotted another woman with the ass part of her skirt completely cut out, and then Ginger coyote and WTD arrived, and ya know. Everything is relative.
The night took too long. The party wasn't starting, the bar was fleecing their customers, NAKED LADY WRESTLERS didn't do that one song off of "Not So Quiet On The Western Front". UGZ reps had travelled all the way to Crockett (about 20 minutes - dry your tears) and no comped beer or shots? Damn, we were out of our element. There seemed to be another party going on behind the bar, through a door with a biker type dude standing guard. That's where all the ass exhibitionists and band folks kept disappearing to, and normally we would be escorted back there and offered all kind of powders, pills, and magical elixirs, but nah. It's Crockett. Finally WHITE TRASH DEBUTANTES played! Yay!! It was cool, punk, and John Waters-esque!!! Livin' la vida loca. The headache and instant Coors hangover was put on hold for Susan Lucci, Dildos Are A Girls Best Friend, and a RAMONES cover, and whatever else - fuck off. It was almost worth it, but pur escape back to the East Bay was put on hold, RIBZY was headlining. Doh!
Sunday, October 29, 2006
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
666 Goast Roasting Party Review, From Da Pit...
BBQ pit that is. No one really does shows reviews anymore, so here is
my review of Bischoff's 666 Goat Roasting / BBQ / 5 band blowout last
night. Let's see....
The UGZ skeleton crew made it's way to Emeryvile at around 5:30 pm
(PST), feeling fairly confident that the 2:30 start time listed on the
flyer was more of a suggested time than an actual time, and we were
correct. After slipping Mark some bills at the gate to help cover
costs (there were costs, you folks that didn't pay), we walked in to
see that the BBQ grills were in full effect and that people, mostly
Oakland punx were grilling and actually participating in the BBQ,
which is a cool thing about Bischoff's. Man, I thought, we shouldn't
have eaten so much earlier on Telegraph, "burp". Oh well. Shit. Where
was the goat? We looked around and saw what appeared to be a fairly
good sized dog roasting on some specialized dog roasting spit that
Mark must have rented for the occasion...hmmmm....no sign of the goat,
just dog. Still evil.
SKINNED ALIVE was playing as we arrived and having just saw them a
couple of days earlier, we mainly listened to them while DaveEd and
Greg Valencia ragged on some metal band, and - to me - SKINNED ALIVE
sounded better on Tuesday than they had at the HazMat on Saturday
night. After the set the entire band emerged, sweaty (except for
Tony), and they seemed happy with their set too. Then there was this
German chick talking about something, and then I said, "Perfect
timing. We got here just in time for SKINNED ALIVE and we didn't have
to see the hippie band that played first," and everybody laughed, then
looked around to see if the hippie was nearby, then laughed again.
What is the world coming to?
We drank some PBR and continued to chat with folks like Loren
Motorhead, Suzie, and Sonny...and Beth, etc. SAHN MARU was already
playing by then, and eventually I made it inside to the front. Sahn
Maru is one of my favorite newer bands, and they were good once again.
Jess was headbanging and sweating so profusely that I had to put my
shades back on. Total crusty, faster, more Scandi sounding version of
what BLOWN TO BITS was doing there at the end of their existence. But,
you already knew that. After Sahn Maru it was a quick trip to the keg
and then back out to the parking lot to kick it a little with WTD
before jamming back inside to watch JESUSFUCKINGCHRIST. JFC are never
a let down, and I watched them do their thang for about 3 or 4 songs
before heading to the pisser. I heard they played a shorter set in
the spirit of keeping the party moving, so that every band would get a
chance to play before some disgruntled neighbor called the police, or
Satan appeared, etc.
While waiting for WTD to set up, old UGZ contributor Jessica showed up
with members of East Bay hip hop group INSPECTOR DOUBLE NEGATIVE,
which was a nice visit at a good point in the party, then it was back
in for some WATCH THEM DIE. Totally went off, and my neck feels like
I have whiplash as I type this. They threw in BLOODBATH and BATHORY
covers, and if they were only as popular in the rest of the Bay Area
as they are at Bischoff's, then it would be less worth mentioning, but
both Sonny (WORD SALAD) and George (HIGH ON FIRE) have really elevated
WTD to a different level. During the set I kept bumping into people
that I knew, which was cool. Folks like Joe Fracas and Yapple, and
Bryan One In The Chamber, Phalyn, Nando...just passing by. This was
at the very front. Oh, and Pete Benumb was at the party too!
Anyway, then there were m-1000s and firecrackers, and people kept
asking, "Hey, where is that goat?"...THEN the police showed up, and we
had to hole up in Bischoff's, drinking beer and doing other stuff to kill an hour or so until they left. Tony S.T.F.U. was physically escorted from the premises by one of the tenants, while singing "Hot
Tub", the Eddie Murphy spoofing James Brown song. Larry Wolfley
finally couldn't take it and made a run for his truck, and everyone
followed his lead, and that was the end. Pretty Much.
666, shit. Off to another party or show or home to watch some evil classics on DVD.
my review of Bischoff's 666 Goat Roasting / BBQ / 5 band blowout last
night. Let's see....
The UGZ skeleton crew made it's way to Emeryvile at around 5:30 pm
(PST), feeling fairly confident that the 2:30 start time listed on the
flyer was more of a suggested time than an actual time, and we were
correct. After slipping Mark some bills at the gate to help cover
costs (there were costs, you folks that didn't pay), we walked in to
see that the BBQ grills were in full effect and that people, mostly
Oakland punx were grilling and actually participating in the BBQ,
which is a cool thing about Bischoff's. Man, I thought, we shouldn't
have eaten so much earlier on Telegraph, "burp". Oh well. Shit. Where
was the goat? We looked around and saw what appeared to be a fairly
good sized dog roasting on some specialized dog roasting spit that
Mark must have rented for the occasion...hmmmm....no sign of the goat,
just dog. Still evil.
SKINNED ALIVE was playing as we arrived and having just saw them a
couple of days earlier, we mainly listened to them while DaveEd and
Greg Valencia ragged on some metal band, and - to me - SKINNED ALIVE
sounded better on Tuesday than they had at the HazMat on Saturday
night. After the set the entire band emerged, sweaty (except for
Tony), and they seemed happy with their set too. Then there was this
German chick talking about something, and then I said, "Perfect
timing. We got here just in time for SKINNED ALIVE and we didn't have
to see the hippie band that played first," and everybody laughed, then
looked around to see if the hippie was nearby, then laughed again.
What is the world coming to?
We drank some PBR and continued to chat with folks like Loren
Motorhead, Suzie, and Sonny...and Beth, etc. SAHN MARU was already
playing by then, and eventually I made it inside to the front. Sahn
Maru is one of my favorite newer bands, and they were good once again.
Jess was headbanging and sweating so profusely that I had to put my
shades back on. Total crusty, faster, more Scandi sounding version of
what BLOWN TO BITS was doing there at the end of their existence. But,
you already knew that. After Sahn Maru it was a quick trip to the keg
and then back out to the parking lot to kick it a little with WTD
before jamming back inside to watch JESUSFUCKINGCHRIST. JFC are never
a let down, and I watched them do their thang for about 3 or 4 songs
before heading to the pisser. I heard they played a shorter set in
the spirit of keeping the party moving, so that every band would get a
chance to play before some disgruntled neighbor called the police, or
Satan appeared, etc.
While waiting for WTD to set up, old UGZ contributor Jessica showed up
with members of East Bay hip hop group INSPECTOR DOUBLE NEGATIVE,
which was a nice visit at a good point in the party, then it was back
in for some WATCH THEM DIE. Totally went off, and my neck feels like
I have whiplash as I type this. They threw in BLOODBATH and BATHORY
covers, and if they were only as popular in the rest of the Bay Area
as they are at Bischoff's, then it would be less worth mentioning, but
both Sonny (WORD SALAD) and George (HIGH ON FIRE) have really elevated
WTD to a different level. During the set I kept bumping into people
that I knew, which was cool. Folks like Joe Fracas and Yapple, and
Bryan One In The Chamber, Phalyn, Nando...just passing by. This was
at the very front. Oh, and Pete Benumb was at the party too!
Anyway, then there were m-1000s and firecrackers, and people kept
asking, "Hey, where is that goat?"...THEN the police showed up, and we
had to hole up in Bischoff's, drinking beer and doing other stuff to kill an hour or so until they left. Tony S.T.F.U. was physically escorted from the premises by one of the tenants, while singing "Hot
Tub", the Eddie Murphy spoofing James Brown song. Larry Wolfley
finally couldn't take it and made a run for his truck, and everyone
followed his lead, and that was the end. Pretty Much.
666, shit. Off to another party or show or home to watch some evil classics on DVD.
Monday, April 10, 2006
Honk Your Horn, Pump Your Fist, Eat A Torta!
I Just came in from the street in front of my pad (International BLVD) where a huge protest and general chaos were taking place. It was an awesome kind of chaos. Thousands of Latinos and political activists were out in force to show support for immigrants and migrant workers who are currently being targeted by republicans as a way of distracting from the war in Iraq, whitehouse leaks of classified information, etc. You know the routine. It's propaganda 101 as taught in Ivy League institutions to aspiring politicians, lobbyists, and Halliburton CEOs. Need someone to blame for the mistakes of presidents and politicians? Immigrants will do. If you are seriously worried that migrant workers and immigrants from Mexico and Central America are going to compromise your safety and even worse (for Americans) the quality of life you've grown accustomed to, then you have definitely reaped the benefits of our stellar public education system. Good job, and by the way, who is your pick for the next American Idol? This is serious business.
I don't know if taking it to the streets really works anymore in terms of the big political picture, but in terms of community I have to say that this neighborhood has never seemed more alive than today. That goes for the big Cinco De Mayo celebrations, and even the Day Of The Dead festival that I attended in 2005.
Oh, and let's not forget the dozens of police that were out in force today, with their bullhorns, cameras, and paddy wagons. Our car has been broken into and vandalized (along with most of our neighbors' cars) at least three times since we've lived here. Not once have we ever witnessed a single cop patrolling this street or doing anything else in our neighborhood besides hanging out at taco trucks and busting prostitutes. It's good to know that they have their priorities in tact. I wanted so much so confront one of them in some heroic manner, like a young Huey Newton, but I could see that their fingers were already fiddling with the buckles around their nightsticks, while their faces exhibited those nervous smiles that try but fail to distract from the exagerrated clenching of jaws and grinding of teeth. I'd sooner save my money for a trip to Paplona, Spain and the next running of the bulls in July.
I don't know if taking it to the streets really works anymore in terms of the big political picture, but in terms of community I have to say that this neighborhood has never seemed more alive than today. That goes for the big Cinco De Mayo celebrations, and even the Day Of The Dead festival that I attended in 2005.
Oh, and let's not forget the dozens of police that were out in force today, with their bullhorns, cameras, and paddy wagons. Our car has been broken into and vandalized (along with most of our neighbors' cars) at least three times since we've lived here. Not once have we ever witnessed a single cop patrolling this street or doing anything else in our neighborhood besides hanging out at taco trucks and busting prostitutes. It's good to know that they have their priorities in tact. I wanted so much so confront one of them in some heroic manner, like a young Huey Newton, but I could see that their fingers were already fiddling with the buckles around their nightsticks, while their faces exhibited those nervous smiles that try but fail to distract from the exagerrated clenching of jaws and grinding of teeth. I'd sooner save my money for a trip to Paplona, Spain and the next running of the bulls in July.
Saturday, April 08, 2006
The Secret FLIPPER Show Last Night.
We were tipped about this secret basement show by a local record label owner and semi-well known scenester about town. The address of the venue (basement) was slipped to us is a dark parking lot (okay it was behind an already occupied bush in Aquatic Park), and then we were off to the show! The rain had stopped and we found our way to the hood, near where the Tidal Wave metal fests take place every year, and then it was just a matter of finding parking and the right house. Both of which were easy to do....TOO EASY. When we got to the house (and you could tell that it was thee spot) there was a sign on the door that read: Flipper canceled. Sorry, we tried to calll everyone.
Shit. It would have been perfect. Perfect weather, perfect location, and oh shit...were we duped? Maybe, but the joke is on anyone who left too soon because while we stared in disbelief at the handwritten sign, Sly Stone pulled up on a three wheel Harley. Yes, Sly fucking Stone! He has platinum hair that's spiked up everywhere - I guess the mohawk grew out or something - and it turns out he is a huge Flipper fan. He told us a story about picking up that old Posh Boy compilation that had Negative Trend on it, and then about how he'd bought every Flipper record, but never got a chance to see them with their original line-up. Will Shatter R.I.P. It was cool. As if that wasn't mind blowing enough, Sly then pulled out this cool little keyboard and played us a couple of new songs that he has written. Powerful, life altering shit. The powers that be will never let him release it. They'd sooner give Fidel Castro his own talk show on MTV. Oh well, that about does it for this secret Flipper show report. It turns out that no one hooked us or our staff photographer up with passes for tonight's show at the Fillmore (I blame Depace), so even though we missed Flipper this time around, a half hour spent with a forty and a sober Sly Stone in San Francisco on a rainy night in April still counts for something.
-Jay Unidos
Shit. It would have been perfect. Perfect weather, perfect location, and oh shit...were we duped? Maybe, but the joke is on anyone who left too soon because while we stared in disbelief at the handwritten sign, Sly Stone pulled up on a three wheel Harley. Yes, Sly fucking Stone! He has platinum hair that's spiked up everywhere - I guess the mohawk grew out or something - and it turns out he is a huge Flipper fan. He told us a story about picking up that old Posh Boy compilation that had Negative Trend on it, and then about how he'd bought every Flipper record, but never got a chance to see them with their original line-up. Will Shatter R.I.P. It was cool. As if that wasn't mind blowing enough, Sly then pulled out this cool little keyboard and played us a couple of new songs that he has written. Powerful, life altering shit. The powers that be will never let him release it. They'd sooner give Fidel Castro his own talk show on MTV. Oh well, that about does it for this secret Flipper show report. It turns out that no one hooked us or our staff photographer up with passes for tonight's show at the Fillmore (I blame Depace), so even though we missed Flipper this time around, a half hour spent with a forty and a sober Sly Stone in San Francisco on a rainy night in April still counts for something.
-Jay Unidos
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
Trying Is Different From Succeeding, So Stop!
When did so many people that I know begin to think that they are the smart ones? It seems that I catch someone trying to be clever or deceptive on an almost daily basis. Playing both sides of the fence effectively is an artform, remember? The oblivious nature of the post seventies generation has crept into the psyche of of our own lumpen majority and it's causing me to yearn for isolation now more than ever before. If not true isolation, then the isolation of being the new person in a big city that I've never lived in before.
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